In the months leading up to the launch of K.LITE, my emotional world kicked into overdrive.
Some of the feelings I was overtly aware of – anxiety, lethargy, and an eagerness for outside reflection – while other thoughts took some time and lens-wiping to gain a clearer focus.
Here I was, 28 years old, and about to share a very sacred side of myself to a very large digital world. A side of myself that for many reasons I’ve always played close to the chest. I can honestly say that my fears felt well-earned and completely justified.
But I didn’t scold nor fight this sentimental existence… nope. Instead, I chose to view it as an omen of something worthwhile I was doing. So I gave it space and simply allowed it to be.
Cause here’s the thing – I wasn’t scared to put myself out there.
Sure you weren’t.
I can wholeheartedly say that I wasn’t.
You see, the chalice of my creative expression had reached the brim such a long while past that any and all fears seemed minute in comparison to the excitement and possibility of letting my soul off leash. I was an overtrained stallion bucking inside the starting gate.
Now, this isn’t to say that I wasn’t at some point absolutely scared shitless of what it might mean to ‘really’ put myself out there. The comments. The feedback. The box I’d be thrown into. Of that, I most definitely had my reservations… for about 10 minutes.
What!?!? That’s it?
Yep, and here’s why…
When I decided a few years back to pursue my Authentic Adventure, I was sure of two things:
1). It was the only doorway to lasting fulfillment and freedom. (Yeah, the only doorway, like for reals).
2). There’ll be judgment either way.
What do you mean?
No matter who you are and what your story happens to be, judgment is a permanent and inevitable part of the game. The happiest, most successful people in the world are the most magnified and evaluated people on the planet. Agreed?
If you pursue your Authentic Adventure (e.g. this blog, that dream business, that totally-against-the-grain way of living), they’ll judge you. If you don’t, they’ll still judge you, and worst of all, you’ll forever judge yourself.
The sole difference between the inward screamers and those radiating and rocking their truth to the planet is that the screamers tiptoe around their Expression whereas the rockers don’t hold anything back. There’s zero divide between ‘who they are’ and ‘who they think they should be.’ The rockers are on full display, vulnerable but empowered.
That’s very inspiring and all, but uhhh… the whole “put judgment to bed part”… not seeing it.
Embrace judgment for the beauty that it is.
Beauty in judgment? You’re off your hinges.
Back to my Authentic Adventure. I didn’t see much of a decision there.
I (You) could (can) either play small ball the rest of my (your) life under the illusion I’d (you’ll) elude ridicule, or I (you) could (can) have complete acceptance of the fear and judgment and bologna to come, and let the power of my (your) Presence be the only endorsement my (your) soul will ever need.
In the end, we’re all susceptible to judgment. That’s what putting yourself “out there” means. But if you break out of the starting gate and do what your soul was designed to do, you’re at least being your truth, and letting the Youniverse know that your Heart’s Desires won’t ever be for sale.