I don’t often write on current events, nor do I ever plan to.  But the sudden passing of actor Robin Williams has impelled me to the page.

Not too long ago, I reflected on some of my favorite films and noticed a running theme – more than half of them featured Robin Williams.  From Dead Poet’s Society to Patch Adams, Good Will Hunting to Hook, there he was.

What was it about him?

For me, above and beyond his arsenal of comedic gifts and the brilliance and diversity of his roles, was the way he made me feel.  So much so that I dedicated a paragraph of my I AM Blueprint (my version of a resume) to the imprint his genuineness had on me:

“I’ve never watched and felt an artist as emotionally bold and deep as Robin Williams.  His vulnerability and gentle spirit connects and expands my heart in a way that I can’t seem to explain.  As though a glimpse into his soft and harmless eyes is a window to the purest, most kind qualities a soul could possibly offer.”

Robin Williams was special to me because of his indelible ability to combine the hilarity of the mundane with the tender of the humane.  The beat of his valve appeared to be plugged into some sort of divine outlet of both humor and heart that even he could not define… or defy.

And yet despite his palpable sentimentality of pulling us into his characters, his internal topography proved too wide a doorway.  As though his DNA was incapable of feeling a lie.  That the exclusive force in charge of sustaining his existence was subject to the Truth, the whole Truth, and nothing but the Truth.

Would it be politically incorrect of me, then, to link the departure of such a vibrant light to the incessant ignorance of our world?

That we’re far too committed to our Facebook status and pumping a soul-zapping amount of fear and immaturity into the masses, from the front page to the Middle East, instead of persistently reminding our planet’s inhabitants that We Are One, and each one of us, overt or not, is a delicate, beautiful, and irreplaceable piece of the human pie.

Would it be a bit too cliché and preachy to repeat that life is fragile?  That hugs and daily acknowledgment and “I love you’s” never go stale?  Or the fact that you matter…. A LOT…. to someone, somewhere… for no particular reason… just because.

I say these things not to imply that a man was not loved or could’ve been saved.  He clearly was and did his best for as long as he could.  I’m also not naïve to the severity of depression or unfamiliar with the basement of sadness.

I say these things to prompt a shift in consciousness.  That where we place our energy is where our world will be.  That it’s never time to pass judgment (“Oh yeah, well he was a druggie,” says the restaurant worker about Robin Williams’s death), and never not the time to live mindfully, gratefully, and on behalf of our Light.

Just this past year, my brother had a unique moment with Robin Williams in L.A.

On his way to a baseball game, the car he was in pulled up to a stoplight.  As he looked over, Trevor noticed that Robin Williams was the passenger in the car next to theirs.  Robin looked at Trevor, smiled, and winked with a subtle sincerity.  In Trevor’s words…

“There was an incredible recognition between the two of us in that very short moment, almost hard to describe.  In seeing him, I felt like my heart could have exploded into tears.  I’ve had a lot of magical experiences in my life, but this was of a different world, as was his heart.”

Did my brother or I know him personally?  Nope, we need not to.  Recognition requires no such formalities for you cannot measure its reach.  It’s a surfacing of the glow we all entail that can’t be limited to a hello or handshake.

Recognition knows… because it’s always been.

God Bless your place in eternity Mr. Williams.

And may God bless the Fullness of you.

Dead Poet’s Society (1989)

What will your verse be?

Patch Adams (1998)

If we’re going to fight a disease, let’s fight one of the most terrible diseases of all — indifference.

Good Will Hunting (1997)

It’s not your fault, Will.  It’s not your fault.

Aladdin (1992)

Genie, you’re free!

Hook (1991)

Oh there you are, Peter!

By contemplating the expansion/contraction criteria, hopefully you have a better idea of the action you’d like to take.

To keep self-inquiring, add these questions to the mix:

1.  How important is this to my soul’s creative evolution?
2.  If I don’t give it a go, will I truly be able to let it go?
3.  Does it feel opportunistic or obligatory?
4.  In other words, does life feel heavier or lighter upon committing?
5.  Am I a little bit scared, but in a totally radical way?
6. Will my light bless others in their light?  I.e. Will the world be better if I shrink and play small ball, or thrive and play TALL ball?
7. Have I qualified, prayed on, set an intention for, journaled about, and/or blessed my leap with the utmost clarity and Grace?
8.  Have I listened deeply?
9.  Am I willing and flexible of how this manifests in the world?  Am I open to an alternate direction?
10.  In saying YES, does the Truth of who I AM feel closer or further away?
11.  And most importantly, do I feel authentically free?   (This is what it’s all about).

Play around with these questions this week.  They’ll help you get even more specific.  And if you’re still not sure, ask yourself:

WHAT LIGHTS ME UP THE MOST?

Simple.  Honest.  Direct.

It’ll never steer you wrong.

Last month I began working on a new project.  Ahhhh!!!

Starting from scratch can freak the bejeezus out of me.  Ask anyone who writes, the blank page can be terrifying.  But I’ve become OK with that.  (No seriously, I have).

Because as I know (yet constantly have to remind myself), all great things in the history of the world began as nothing.  Nada.  Zip.  Zilch.

The Sistine Chapel.  The Declaration of Independence.  The iPhone app that turns your phone into a flashlight.  Nothing.

So repeat this with me – Kumbaya-style if you must:

All great things in the history of the world began as nothing.  Nada.  Zip.  Zilch.

Awesome job.

Now, let that be your Force.

The other reason I’m comfortable when diving into the creative unknown is that no matter how scary a new project may be, I’m willing to go through uncertainty, confusion, and frustration (you should too) to arrive in a Land of Certainty, Clarity, and Fulfillment.  It’s a magical place (like Neverland for adults) and totally worth the journey.

That is to say that I LOVE what I do and the gratification that comes from a full page and completed activity vastly outweighs the fear of a blank one and never having started.  That passion is the fuel to my creative gas tank.

Which brings me to the guide…

When you’re thinking about doing that thing that you’re thinking about doing, consistently and repeatedly, like a teenage girl updating her Facebook status, ask yourself the following questions before anything else:

Do I feel contracted?

or

Do I feel expanded?

This thing, that thing, that other thing, that other, other thing.  Contracted? Or expanded?

With who, where, why, how.  Contracted?  Or expanded?

Today, tomorrow, next week, next month, next year. Contracted?  Or expanded?

The difference goes like this…

A contracted feeling pulls you in, making you feel smaller.  It’s a shrinking energy that you never look forward to.  You know those painful cramps women have right before giving birth?  Ya, they’re called contractions for a reason.  Ask how much fun they are.

Although my contracted state may not be physically painful, it’s emotionally, spiritually, and mentally both unsettling and draining.  And it’s easy to pinpoint.

When I contract , fun and enthusiasm disappear and the dread kicks in.  I become impatient and turn into a realist (my greatest fear) rather than an idealist (the Real Me).

On the flip side, an Expanded feeling makes you feel BIGGER.  It’s an all-encompassing influx of inspiration that shoots out from your core as if you could lift right off the ground.  It enthralls you with that Knowing where you may not be able to sleep at night until you at least give it a try.

And regardless of the cynics and naysayers, in an Expanded state, nothing affects your commitment to the vision because you’re lit from Within.  There isn’t time for the peanut-gallery nonsense because you’re Fired Up, Jacked up, and ready to Giddy the Fuck Up.

In my experience, if expansion is the source and at the forefront of what I’m doing, it’s all I need to know to get movin’ and a groovin.’  And identifying these feelings is the most efficient way to making those big (and small) life/career/anything and everything decisions.

The hard way?  Well, there isn’t one.  It’s only hard if you make it hard.  So choose wisely.

Make a list of your current activities and the ones you’d LOVE to do sometime this week.  After, apply the expansion/contraction criteria. It’s that simple, really.

A month into my project, I continue to ask myself these questions.  For me, it’s part of the creative process.  Sort of like a weekly well-being physical (minus the pant-dropping and endless paperwork you sign but never read).

Are you expanded here T.J.?   No.

OK, what about here?  Yep!

Great.  Let’s begin.

View from Lakshman Jhula Bridge in Rishikesh, India.

In March of this year, I went on a two-week adventure to India.

Up until the day I booked it, I hadn’t a single premonition of traversing the globe any time soon.  Zero.  I was open to it, sure.  But aside from the States, nothing stood imminent on my travel radar.  India especially.

And then one fall day amidst my daily routine at the coffeehouse, I stumbled upon a Tweet.  Mistake airfare prices.  Limited destinations.  24-hour window.  So I started to click around.

The routing was primarily to Europe, the Middle East, and Australia.  Europe was a no-go, since I recently returned from Italy.  Dubai wasn’t high enough on my bucket list quite yet.  And Australia, well, the tiny discount didn’t coax a commitment.

What about India, I casually-but-not-seriously thought, a place I some day would like to explore.

After a few more clicks, it turns out India is an option (I secretly hoped it wasn’t) – Mumbai and Delhi only – and from my location, tickets are one-third the price.  Wowza!  Interest piqued, but totally detached, I continue to follow the inkling.

As the day goes on, the idea sticks with me.  Now at home, I’m flipping through the calendar with my atlas out and Wiki India open.  A surge of both curiosity and thoughtlessness had completely taken over.

And ultimately, it won.

No advanced planning or room for rationalization.  I went to get some coffee and ended up with a ticket to India.  Unarguably the most liberating YES I’ve said to date.  Pre-trip insight:

Let thrill be thy will.  Seriously, let it.  Good shit will happen.

The following day, I reflected on the enormous energy that pulled me to buy the plane ticket.  And through a little introspection, well, I realized that India had been incubating in my subconscious for quite some time.

small hints from that week alone:

:  shopped for a new mala.
:  sat next to an Indian family at lunch.
:  watched an Anne Lamott interview about her life-affirming trip to India.
:  started doing Kundalini yoga.
:  was curious about a PBS documentary called India.

(Didn’t connect any of this at the time).

the LOUD whispers:

:  two weeks prior while on the road, I checked into a motel in rural Arkansas.  The hotel manager was an Indian man.  While waiting for my room, I noticed a copy of the Bhagavad Gita in the breakfast area.  “Can I borrow this for the night, sir?” I asked politely.

“The Vad Gita?” he responded.

“Yes.”  (And wow, he said that way cooler than me).

“You can have it.”

Totally sublime moment.  P.S.  If you’re looking for Krishna, his latest incarnation landed him a night-gig at the America’s Best Value Inn in Morrilton, Arkansas.  Just sayin’…

: speaking of Krishna, the day before I purchase my India ticket, I spontaneously decide to sell my old computer on Craigslist.  Hours after listing it, I receive an e-mail offer from one individual.  His name?

Krishna.  (True story).

Did all of these things validate my decision?  Not really, but they’re nice reflections of the magic at-bat even when we’re not trying to “think things up.”

In the end, it came down to resonance and grace.  I’m super duper committed to the road of my code and India was a major green light.  Which, in retrospect, made the choice quite easy, actually.

HOW TO RESPOND TO GUIDANCE (or HOW TO CHOOSE BOLDLY)

1.  Move with the resonance.

Something was working through me that Saturday afternoon.  So much so that I had virtually no fear around my 8,000-mile decision. I figure if you can’t shake the pull, maybe it’s because you’re not supposed to?  Just a thought.  Keep swimming with the current.

2.  Choose with a brisk pace.

There was about a three-hour gap between the idea of India and the clicking of the “confirm” button.  During that time I allowed a lot of egoic silliness to creep in.  You’re going to India…really T.J.?  Quick, point to Delhi on a map.  I knew the longer I withheld, the more I’d delude the spark.  The 24-hour shot clock was my opportunity to practice on-the-spot choosing.  If you think about it, deadlines can be magical starting lines, really.

3.  Realize there’s more at work than what meets the eye.

On the surface, I bought a plane ticket to India, an exotic and faraway land. Temples, the Taj, rickshaws, and chai.  But on a cellular level, there was so much more aligning.  There were stories and synchronicities and miracles being placed on my path that I could never have dreamt of, planned for, or placed in a better spot at a better time.  That goes for your path too.  Get comfortable with that truth.

4.  Give yourself permission to be completely swept off your feet.  It’s OK.

Transportation and hotel bookings and dogsitters are small details, not excuses to cede the Call.  Get jacked up.  Be illogical.  Free your fire. Sometimes you just gotta go with it.  Life’s greatest accomplishments were built by souls without a clue of how they’d pull it off.  And they did…. somehow…. in some way.  You will too.

5.  Don’t try to explain “why.”

When I told people about India, I received one of two responses:  “What, why would you go to India?” (filled with judgment and prudence), and “Wow, what an experience that will be!  I can’t wait to hear about it” (filled with awe and inspiration).  There wasn’t much middle of a ground here, people either “got it” or didn’t at all.  And to those who didn’t, I found myself defaming my Call, “Well, ya know, I got a really good price on a flight.”  Bullshit!  That was just the final piece. Lesson?

Never ever ever try to justify a Spirit Call.  Ever.  That’s a sacred agreement between you and your Source.

6.  Remember what makes you feel ALIVE.

Feeling alive is your greatest service to mankind.  It’s like a big Thank You card to the Divine.  Dare to see the beauty and brilliance through the simple act of participating in your play.

Keep responding to life and she’ll keep on talking.